Left Behind
by SaffronAngel
Summary: When the Doctor leaves Rose in London without any explanation, what happens to her? How does she cope? WARNING: Dark fic ahead.


DISCLAIMER: The characters you recognize aren't mine. Just borrowing them for a little bit.

SUMMARY: The Doctor has brought Rose back to England and left her behind with no explanation other than to say it was for her own good.

* * *

He had done it. He had left her behind. After all his promises that he wouldn't do that, he left her behind. Oh, he claimed it was for her own good. He said that he couldn't bear the thought of her dying while in his care. He swore that he wouldn't be the cause of her death and that, as long as she stayed with him, it was entirely too possible that that is exactly what would happen.

She had walked into the Powell Estates only to find out that her mother had recently moved in with her boyfriend. She was planning her wedding and there was no room for Rose.

The next thing anyone knew, Rose was on the bus to go to Sara Jane's house. She found her way there and knocked on the front door.

"Rose!" Sara Jane was thrilled to see the younger woman until she noticed the tears building up in her eyes. "What happened?"

"He left me. He promised he would never do that to me but he did! I don't know what to do! My mum doesn't have room for me anymore because she moved in with her boyfriend and there's no room for me! What am I going to do?"

Sara Jane pulled the young woman into her arms and stood there rocking her for a few moments before taking her inside and showing her to an extra bedroom. She tucked Rose into the bed and went out to fix some dinner.

* * *

Just moments after Sara Jane left the room, Rose stood up and walked into the ensuite bathroom. She locked the door behind her and sat down on the toilet. Burying her face in her hands, she started sobbing.

"What did I do so wrong that he just left me like this? What's wrong with me? Why does my love life always end like this? Why?" She stood up and looked in the mirror. "I'll show him. I'll show them all. I don't have to live like this." She opened the medicine cabinet and pulled out a razor blade.

Steeling herself, she lay the blade along the main artery in her arm. She wouldn't wait for life to deal her a decent hand. She was leaving it. She didn't want it anymore.

She pulled the blade, watching the red well up from her skin. The blood started flowing freely from the slice in her arm and, as Rose watched, a puddle began to form on the floor around her feet. She seemed to be almost hypnotized watching the puddle grow.

She felt herself sliding into darkness just about the time that the knocking started at the bathroom door. Her eyes closed just before Sara Jane burst through the door to see the sight in front of her. Rose had slit her wrist.

* * *

Once Rose was at the hospital and in surgery, Sara Jane stepped outside with her mobile and, taking a deep breath, pressed the button. Tears started flowing from her eyes as she heard the familiar voice on the other end.

"Hello?"

"Doctor, this is Sara Jane. I think you should come to my house right away. It's about Rose."

* * *

Sara Jane met the Doctor at her front door. It had taken him just a few minutes to hit the right point in the timeline.

She gestured for him to follow her. "Just hours ago, Rose showed up at my front door practically in tears. I took her up to this room." She opened the door to the room she had put Rose in. "I tucked her in and went to make her something to eat. When I came back, I found her in the bathroom along with this." She threw open the bathroom door where the puddle of blood was still on the floor.

"What happened?" He was horrified. What could have left this blood on the floor like this? He touched one finger to it. Lifting it to his face, he recognized the scent to it. He tasted it and his mouth dropped open. Horror crossed his face. The blood told the story that he wasn't ready to hear.

He saw it in his mind. She had been so devastated by being left behind by him and finding out that she no longer had a home that she had decided to end her life. She didn't want to be in a world where he wasn't.

"Where is she?" He turned to Sara Jane with his own tears in his eyes. His Rose. She had tried to kill herself. Because --- of--- him.

"Come with me, Doctor." She wrapped an arm around him and led him out to her car with the intent of taking him to the hospital. "I didn't want to tell you this way but something told me that it was the only way to get you to listen to the truth. Rose loves you. You love her. Even more than you loved me at one time." When he opened his mouth to rebuff her, she held up one hand. "Don't deny it. You loved me once and maybe still do after a fashion. But she's the one you want with you now."

They got in the car and Sara Jane drove the two of them to the hospital.

* * *

When he walked into Rose's room, he had a hard time believing that the pale and thin girl on the bed was his Rose. She didn't look like herself.

Sitting down beside her, he pushed the hair back out of her face. "Rose? Rose, can you hear me?"

Rose moaned in her sleep. It was a heartbreaking sound. The Doctor turned to Sara Jane. "Sara Jane, can you keep a watch outside for me? I need to do something and I can't be interrupted."

"You're going into her mind. Aren't you?"

The Doctor nodded. "I don't think that I could explain it to the nurses if they saw me doing it."

Sara Jane nodded and stepped out of the room. She would protect the Doctor in any way possible.

Meanwhile, the Doctor took a deep breath and placed his fingertips along Rose's face much as he had when he had looked into Reinette's mind. He wasn't sure he wanted to do this but he really had no other way to find out what was going on.

He opened his mind and felt himself step into Rose's mind. He saw her reaction when she realized that her mother didn't live in the flat anymore. The fear she had when the door had opened and someone she didn't know had stood there.

They had explained that her mother had moved out just a couple of months earlier. She had even left her new address just in case her daughter should come looking for her.

When she had knocked on her mother's new door, her mother's reception had been enthusiastic but not as warm as it used to be. Come to find out, Rose had been gone for almost eighteen months this time. Jackie had moved on with her life. She had moved in with her boyfriend and was planning a wedding.

But there had been no room for Rose in the flat. It was a one bedroom place and Rose of course had no money for an inn. She had nowhere else to go so she went to Sara Jane's.

Sara had been so happy to see her before she realized that the inevitable had finally happened. She had given Rose somewhere to rest and was more than willing to give her a place to stay for as long as she needed to get back on her feet.

Just then the sorrow Rose felt hit him. He saw the thoughts that she must have done something terrible in order to make him break his promise. He had never broken a promise. Not to her anyway.

He tried to pull her into his mind; to show her how much he hated leaving her behind but that he had to. It was the only way to protect her. It was the only way to make sure that she would be safe.

He flooded her with his emotions. All the things that he had so much trouble expressing in words flowed from him to her. He wanted her to know that he was sorry he had hurt her so badly.

She felt it. She felt everything he was trying to express to her. He did love her. He was frightened that what he had to go do would have been too much for her. He didn't want to hurt her or scare her.

But then she saw the events that had unfolded on the Game Station. She saw herself, glowing with the Vortex. Saw him kiss her to take the vortex from her, knowing that it was going to kill him. He had cost himself one of his regenerations to save her.

Rose's eyes flew open as the realization hit her. She found herself looking straight at the face that she had come to love herself. He had been trying to protect her. She started crying.

"Rose? Rose, talk to me."

"How could you even want to see me after what I did to you?" she whimpered.

"What do you mean? What did you do to me?"

"I killed you." The soft whisper almost didn't reach his ears.


End file.
